Aardvarks to Zebras

I had the day off of work, so I let The Killer play hookey and hang out with me. We started out at Panera for bagels and she of course had to have a USA Today to read. She got used to reading it during all those stays we made at Holiday Inn Express where we got it free every day. Then we went to the Zoo which is always dicey this time of year and sure enough we pulled up and there were 16,000 school buses there from all over the state. One of my great annoyances. I have never understood the mass field trip. It seems like 30 kids visiting the inner workings of the zoo would get so much more out of it than beleaguered teachers letting thousands of them loose at the zoo gate and standing at the entrance figuring if they cover the exits it will all work out. Besides, I thought the school districts were strapped for gas money. It was such a sea of humanity that even SGK was daunted, so we went over to the Omniplex instead.

It was pretty quiet in there, but the elderly volunteer there assured it wouldn't last the hour. The Omniplex is every parent's nightmare. Even if you aren't germphobe, you're always uneasy because with 10,000 hands-on exhibits and 10,000 kids, the only thing your kid learns is a lesson in public health. The Big O is a sad old institution anyway. Most of the exhibits have been in there since the late 70s and they look it. And, although it's not entirely their fault, there isn't much science going on in there. The initial wave of small-town school buses struck about a half-hour after we got there and all the boys ran through the exhibits frantically pushing buttons and turning dials while the girls huddled around in groups of three in any available corner and waited for there turn at the Best Friends Forever photobooth. None entered the air and space part or the art galleries. It just seems like such a waste. I'm not an old fogey; I know it's a field trip and firld trips are supposed to be fun. But just take them to Frontier City or Celebration Station or something.

We ended up having a nice time, though. For one thing SGK like the stuff upstairs so we were able to do that in relative museum peace. She liked the mock AWACS mission and running the trains and we spent about 45 minutes in the photography exhibits. Then we went to the gardens in the back. They have really gone downhill as well. There were hardly any plants outside and the greenhouse and mini-arboretum were empty. But when we went out there we looked over at the zoo and noticed the herds were being driven back to the buses. So we went next door and made the rounds. I asked SGK what she wanted to see first and she said she didn't care; she likes animals from aardvarks to zebras. The little snot wanted to see everything and so we we did. Spring is quite the season at the zoo - we saw flamingoes copulating and giraffes necking; they really did; they entwined their necks around each other. Between the two places we were on our feet for six hours and she never complained.